I’ve never met a man of faith who didn’t want to be spiritual leader in his home.
He may not have known whether he could do it, may not have seen how he could possibly make time for it, but it’s something he knows he should do. Moreover, believing parents know their kids need a strong foundation of faith, and they want to be able to give it to them.
One of the hard truths about the modern Christian home is that fewer than 10 percent engage with one another for the express purpose of encouraging or informing their growing faith. And not 1 percent could show you any written plan that even briefly describes the spiritual direction they’re praying for and working toward together.
If ever there was a math equation that didn’t make sense or add up, it’s that one.
For twenty years of married life, I was square in the middle of the 99.9 percenters. Despite having been a prominent business executive with three of the most recognizable companies in the world (Citibank, Coca-Cola, and Johnson & Johnson), despite being an elder at one of the largest churches in the greater Atlanta area, despite being confident in my abilities to lead a well-constructed Bible study for any group of people on any Sunday, I was admittedly failing—and failing miserably—as the spiritual leader in my home. I was succeeding just about everywhere else in life, except for the one place where I was truly irreplaceable.
One chilly December weekend, my wife, Wanda, and I were away from home, off on an anniversary trip to the north Georgia mountains. We were celebrating fifteen years together in marriage. The peace and quiet gave us time to talk without interruption about the past and the future, and our memories and dreams. It was wonderful. I loved every minute of it.
But, being the business leader I am—Wanda being the thoughtful woman that she is—we planned to spend a portion of the weekend reflecting on three specific questions, as related to our children and family:
1. Where have we been?
2. Where are we?
3. Where are we going?
Back and forth we went—an unhurried rekindling of the vows we made a decade earlier. Some of it rich and full; some of it competing confusing, and highly challenging because any time you have children, as you know, you have worries and concerns. Wanda, astute as ever, points out that even though we had good kids, who were steady in church, strong in character, staying out of trouble—life is still working against them all the time. She was grateful for how well our kids were doing and proud of who they were growing up to be. But she was beginning to ache in advance for the kinds of settings and scenarios they were fast approaching, times when Sunday school answers wouldn’t cut it any longer when faith would need to be theirs, not just an extension of ours.
It challenges us to pause and reflect on the state of our parenting—both the past and the future. A Victorious Family exists in a Christ-centered home where there is a recognized need for spiritual growth, and an intentional plan to see it through. Let’s consider how we can begin or recommit to that process today.
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